Guide Them With Your Eyes

A verse I find quite intriguing in the Scriptures is found in Psalm 32:8 I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye. This is one of the penitential psalms when David came back to God after his sin with Bathsheba. What I find intriguing is that God tells us that He guides us with His eye; eyes which none of us have physically seen, but of which we are subtly aware.

Dr. Ross Campbell in his book, How to Really Love Your Child, discusses the vital nature of eye contact as we rear our children. He said, “An infant’s eyes begin focusing somewhere about two to four weeks of age. One of the first images that holds an infant’s attention is the human face, but in particular the baby focuses on the eyes.” He explains how a child is nurtured emotionally through the eyes of his parents.

Wise is the parent who makes effective use of eye contact. Children understand best and communicate much better when they are looking into the eyes of their parents. A child can detect the love and sincerity of a parent’s correction by observing it in their eyes. By the same token, they can be deeply wounded by the angry rage and the disgusted look in those same eyes. We may attempt to cover up our inner feelings with feigned words; our tongues may tell a tale, but our eyes seldom lie.

At times we as parents can develop the terrible habit of using eye contact only to make a strong point and most especially the negative sort. Young children and teens can get the impression that we don’t care because all they ever see from our eyes is displeasure. The continual lashing of a disappointed look or worse yet refusing to make eye contact at all can be devastating to a child and possibly an incident they will never forget. Read the story of David’s refusal to see his son Absalom.

Contrast this with the loving look Peter received from the Lord Jesus when he denied Him the third time. Not a word was spoken; all was communicated by eye contact. Watch a skilled parent whose toddler is about to lay hold on something forbidden, there’s a snap of the finger or a clearing of the voice, then that correcting glance… but keep on watching, because once that child does right, he looks back again to feed on that reassuring look of approval.